Wedding? Yes, please!
I have thought a long time about how to open this blog. I have weighed different subjects and finally I have decided to talk about me. I’m not sure you will share my choice, but so what!! In the end I felt like telling a story! I tell you about a day of sixteen years ago, a day in September, my day of September. It was really hot, the ceremony had been scheduled inside the Town Hall at 6.00 pm and l, who was the bride, the protagonist, the princess of the fairy tale, I have been sneezing all along!! I had a kind of allergy to the flowers, to my aunt who ironed my dress trice, to my mom who cooked clams, to my dad who has been sulky all day long. I don’t have the hearth to publish it but I’d really like you to see his expression in the ritual picture. My beautiful dad, stingy ‘till last minute, did not even give in a smile. I well remember that I was not excited, rather I was curious. I admit, at twenty-one I did not exactly understand what I was doing! I was in love and it was the only motivation I needed. My friends, gathered around me, were as much curious as I was. I was the first in my circle of friends who got married, and actually for many years I’ve been the one! I pride myself on being a pioneer! And after all is said and done I was a good example! At 5.00 pm the florist with the umpteenth basket of flowers, a friend of mine sent me beautiful tulips. On the greeting card I read: “You still have a chance. I am waiting for you downstairs, engine on!”. I remember laughing but don’t recall wishing to run away. With few awareness and great arrogance I instinctively knew that it was the right thing. It was not a wild pitch, I was sure! I was not running away, I was not remedy, I was not having a try. I was getting married with full, certain, clear premeditation! And believe me, with my peach rose dress I’ve never been so beautiful anymore! After walking into the Town Hall on my grumpy dad’s arm, I saw my sweetheart, so elegant and scented. He looked at me and then he told me what any woman would like to hear every day: “Elena…you’re really beautiful”. And then a tear and right after the twist, his getaway!! You got it, my groom escaped leaving me in the middle of a marble circle with my bouquet made of sheaf of wheat. I remember laughing of nervousness, of surprise… I looked around, the confusion on the face of my parents in law and my dad’s cruel glaze! It took few minutes, few long instants that will forever last in my memories. During those minutes my husband chose me. And so, the happy end, or rather the happy beginning. I put on my wedding ring and I kissed the groom! And here I am after sixteen years still talking about that. Why? Because I feel lucky for showing courage and for that unawareness. Because in spite of some dull moments, though there have been some gaps and we followed different paths, although sometimes I felt and keep on feeling lonely while we are two of us, in spite of all that I believe in the marriage! Or rather, I believe in the union between two persons who accept to change together over and over again, who do not try to photocopy the moments because they know that some moments are one in a million and because they are always curious to see how unique will be the future ones! I’m lucky because I found, without looking for it, the true love. That kind of love that it doesn’t matter if I’m beautiful and good, I love you as well. That kind of love that I never have to interpret a role because I’m always in the right place at the right moment. That kind of love which you don’t need to hold fast because anyhow it doesn’t want to go away. Did you read so far? Then I really have to include the moral of the story! The moral, at least according to me, is that the person who’s always there for me is simply different, he changes, he improves (or gets worse) he grows up and me as well. The key is you accept the wonderful dynamic nature of life and stop following purpose-built models. The bond between two persons who chose each other cannot and must not be the same as itself. It should always flip its assumptions in order to be alive and vital. To do this you need a good deal of diplomacy, great patience, a good self-knowledge and the cleverness to find out new things about yourself and about the person you have chosen! Of course we don’t have to forget about some good sex…But this is another story!